By Todd Wilson

Hey Dad, 

I don’t know about you, but I’ve pretty much given up hope for warm, spring weather. We have a nice sunny day…and then like today…YUK. It feels wet, cold, and windy. But the thing about life is that there are still chores to do, projects to finish, and family that needs us.

Sigh…it just seems a lot easier when the sun is shining. But the thing is…dads can’t take off days for crummy weather.

It reminds me of a conversation I had with a dad several years ago. I was speaking at a family event. Unusually, at most events there’s always a dad or two who latches on like a little brother. After I talk, they come up and chat. At breaks, they stop in and tell me a story. At lunch, they sit at my table.

This dad was that dad. All weekend he hung around and laughed and joked, but at the end of the event he came up and got all serious. It was like he was holding back one question until he knew it was safe to ask.

He looked at me and his voice got soft, so no one would overhear, “So what makes a good dad?” he asked.

I knew what he wanted. He was a man…and wanted a formula that he could implement and be the dad he pictured in his mind. One who always had the right answer, used a gentle voice, spoke wisdom in tense situations, was loving, but firm, and was…perfect.

He wanted three zingers with action points…But I wasn’t about to give a simple answer to a complex question. Besides, I hate that kind of answer. I knew there were no zingers, steps, or action points. I didn’t give him an answer, but promised I would think on it.

For a couple of months, I pondered his question, “What makes a good dad?” I chewed and thought, and then it came to me after I had blown it with one of my children.

A good dad is one who never stops trying. That’s it. He blows it, asks forgiveness, and just keeps on going.

That’s a lot easier to say than to do. There are times when I fail, get all mad…and my son or daughter is equally mad. They shut down…and I want to as well. BUT dads don’t get to shut down any more than we can take a break because it’s a yucky, cold, spring day.

A good dad isn’t perfect. He still gets mad, says mean things, gives his family the silent treatment, and is just awful at times. BUT HE NEVER STOPS TRYING.

So Dad, I don’t know what’s going on in your family right now, but if you’ve got a break in a relationship…mend it. Go to the child (or even your wife), ask forgiveness, and get back in the game. I’ll do the same.

You ‘da dad,

Todd

Todd Wilson

"The Familyman"

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